You’re probably wondering why I’m wearing a straw hat to promote the final book in the Windy Mountain series — the one that hasn’t even been written yet — and how I could possibly know what hat I’ll be asked to wear.

Well, that’s where you’re wrong. Wanna make something of it?
The author has promised to send me on a cruise.
I can’t tell you any more, mainly because he hasn’t told me any more, and I’m not the type of bloke who makes stuff up.
The book cover features a chauffeur, but I’ve never had a driver’s licence, so we can rule me out of that hat.
I’m more concerned he might be thinking about killing me off.
He’s done that before to key characters, you know.
It’s like he thinks he’s George R. R. Martin instead of John Martin.
Lots of gruesome ways to die on a cruise ship. Lifejacket malfunction. Death by buffet. Being forced to walk the plank after being voted off the ship.
He’s not a proper author anyway.
He doesn’t plan a plot — he just smashes ideas together to see what sparks.
He’s reliant on me to carry the story.
He wouldn’t kill me, would he?
I’ve just bought this straw hat.
When it’s finally published, you’ll find Blokes Do the Block as an ebook on Amazon, Kobo, Apple Books and Barnes & Noble. If you prefer the smell of paper and ink, the paperbacks will be on Amazon too